Sorry it has been so long. Things here are moving at a fantastic pace.... my house is on the market as of Monday evening at 5pm and I am currently at my Mama'a house. I leave for our new city on Tuesday to house hunt.... life is moving right along.
Only about 12 more weeks til I get to see The Hubster. I miss his face. I miss hearing his voice on a daily basis. I miss his silly jokes and goofy times together. Soon I will get him for about three weeks and then he will fly to join his new ship. Then I only have to wait for June and we will be together, in a home, for a bit. Of course, he will deploy again, but getting a little respite from separation will be nice.
Things like this make you wonder.... how we each have changed, how that will come together to work into our relationship, what kind of adjustments will we have to tweak for things to go smoothly. We have always meshed so well, complimenting each other's personality... will it be the same this time? Will it be easy for us or more difficult. This unaccompanied tour has been a strain on both of us. I haven't been able to "take care" of him, I haven't felt as safe and secure as I normally do, and we are now empty nesters. Big changes. I have made some and so has he. He has outgrown his uniforms because he is working out once or twice a day every day. Looks like I will be setting up a home gym for him. He has been in "work mode" for 24 hours a day almost every day. It might be hard to get him to relax, unwind, feel "normal". He won't have driven a car for about a year. He won't have gone out to dinner at a nice restaurant, or hung out with friends who are separate from work. He definitely will not have slept past 6 am, even on days off. He will have gone to work every day... 7 days a week, in uniform.
I think it will happen smoothly. I hope it will happen joyfully. I know it will happen lovingly. I just can't wait to see his face!
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
wow - I got nothing but serious!
I talked to a friend today - she almost died this weekend... almost died because someone spiked her drink with what was probably a very large dose of GHB. What the heck!
She was out for drinks, with her husband, at a popular night spot. No sooner did her husband go to the bathroom and she ordered a glass of wine..... let's just say that by the time he came out of the bathroom she was on the ground passed out and vomiting. She definitely could have died.
This is the kind of thing that is scary. Just plain old frightening. This is why I can watch a scary movie without batting an eyelash - what happens in the "real" world is so much worse. So, so much worse.
I had to stop and ponder. I had to think of this person maybe not existing anymore except in our memories. This young, vital woman who loves to help others, has a dog and a husband that she loves more than life itself, has a life and friends and people she is important to.... she could have died. All because some idiot wanted sex.
I like sex, don't get me wrong, but in the big scheme of things I can definitely go without..... particularly if it meant risking someone's life.
What kind of person does that? Drugs a drink to get someone so blotto that they can't consent or say no? Is that really sex? I always thought sex took two, unless one was flying solo.... does sex like this even count?
This so saddens me, angers me, makes me rail against the system that makes it so hard to track down predators like this....
quite frankly, it makes me sick.
I don't know what we can do to make this different but I am pondering it.
She was out for drinks, with her husband, at a popular night spot. No sooner did her husband go to the bathroom and she ordered a glass of wine..... let's just say that by the time he came out of the bathroom she was on the ground passed out and vomiting. She definitely could have died.
This is the kind of thing that is scary. Just plain old frightening. This is why I can watch a scary movie without batting an eyelash - what happens in the "real" world is so much worse. So, so much worse.
I had to stop and ponder. I had to think of this person maybe not existing anymore except in our memories. This young, vital woman who loves to help others, has a dog and a husband that she loves more than life itself, has a life and friends and people she is important to.... she could have died. All because some idiot wanted sex.
I like sex, don't get me wrong, but in the big scheme of things I can definitely go without..... particularly if it meant risking someone's life.
What kind of person does that? Drugs a drink to get someone so blotto that they can't consent or say no? Is that really sex? I always thought sex took two, unless one was flying solo.... does sex like this even count?
This so saddens me, angers me, makes me rail against the system that makes it so hard to track down predators like this....
quite frankly, it makes me sick.
I don't know what we can do to make this different but I am pondering it.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Taxes - Yuck!!!
Yes, this is political.... I don't like taxes. I don't like to pay them. I don't like to do the paperwork.... all in all they are an onerous task. This coming year they will be even worse.
The tax credits we have enjoyed for the last decade are expired. Congress hasn't extended them - maybe because we are, as a country, trillion of dollars in debt. Whatever. Getting them extended has become a battle of political parties. One party wants to extend them for a few, another wants to extend them for all.
I'm not one of the rich. Not even close. But why not extend them for everyone? The rich already pay more in taxes than the rest of us... why should they be further penalized?
There is a website (I need to find it again) that figures your tax liability with and without the tax credits being extended. The liability that I (we) will assume is between $8,000 and $12,000.... that means that my taxable income increases by that much. Are you kidding me?!?! Really?!?!
We don't make that much money. We really don't. I said a little prayers of thanks that I was gainfully unemployed this year - otherwise my WHOLE SALARY would be piled on that tax liability. Bad enough that when I did work our refund was $0.00.... would hate to see what we would owe if the credits were not extended.
You can look up what any military member makes.... until you are an O-6 (Captain) there really isn't enough money to pay a $3,500 tax bill - which is right around what we will be looking at. Gross.
So.... I am unhappily itemizing every item I am preparing to donate to the Goodwill or Disabled American Vets.... giving fair market value and depreciating cost.... Of course, I do have to say that this beats the beans out of a yard sale but that isn't the point.
If we keep going on this way, as a country, not only will our government be broke, we will have no middle class.
Just my thoughts....
The tax credits we have enjoyed for the last decade are expired. Congress hasn't extended them - maybe because we are, as a country, trillion of dollars in debt. Whatever. Getting them extended has become a battle of political parties. One party wants to extend them for a few, another wants to extend them for all.
I'm not one of the rich. Not even close. But why not extend them for everyone? The rich already pay more in taxes than the rest of us... why should they be further penalized?
There is a website (I need to find it again) that figures your tax liability with and without the tax credits being extended. The liability that I (we) will assume is between $8,000 and $12,000.... that means that my taxable income increases by that much. Are you kidding me?!?! Really?!?!
We don't make that much money. We really don't. I said a little prayers of thanks that I was gainfully unemployed this year - otherwise my WHOLE SALARY would be piled on that tax liability. Bad enough that when I did work our refund was $0.00.... would hate to see what we would owe if the credits were not extended.
You can look up what any military member makes.... until you are an O-6 (Captain) there really isn't enough money to pay a $3,500 tax bill - which is right around what we will be looking at. Gross.
So.... I am unhappily itemizing every item I am preparing to donate to the Goodwill or Disabled American Vets.... giving fair market value and depreciating cost.... Of course, I do have to say that this beats the beans out of a yard sale but that isn't the point.
If we keep going on this way, as a country, not only will our government be broke, we will have no middle class.
Just my thoughts....
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Big sigh of relief....
So, I had skin cancer. Note the had. I was pretty sure it was a "bad spot" when I first went to the doctor....
There was some stress in finally getting to a dermatologist and then there was the wait... who really wants to wait for results? When they came it wasn't much of a shock - but the way they came was.
I got a piece of paper in the mail on a Friday that said I had cancer. It didn't say what kind. It didn't say anything accept to keep my follow up in two weeks. No phone call. No further explanation... just "you have cancer".
So, I dropped by my doc's office on Monday, with the little piece of paper in hand. The whole office was pretty freaked out about the manner in which the results were delivered. Really?!? No call, just a piece of paper in the mail? Yep. It still kind of freaks me out.
I got sent to an oncologist. Two weeks later I had a huge chunk of skin and the "bad spot" removed.
All in all the good outweighed the bad Yes, it was cancer - bad. It was basal cell carcinoma - not really good but they usually don't come back. They got it all on the first swipe - good.
Now we are two weeks outs from the procedure - I have no stitches as of yesterday, but I am stuck together with three thick pieces of steri-tape and still have to move carefully.
I feel weird. I had cancer. Granted I didn't have to have any other therapies outside of a minor surgical procedure but still - cancer?
I feel changes coming - I am old, well, kind of. I have had a skin cancer "scare". I have fibro. I take blood pressure meds. I am often achy - probably from the fibro but I have arthritis in my back, hands, and feet. I buy wrinkle repair cream. I now often think that certain clothes and styles are "too young" for me.
OMG - I am middle aged. I don't think I like this.
I must go, and ponder this. I am hoping it is just an "empty nest" thing and I'll get over it.
There was some stress in finally getting to a dermatologist and then there was the wait... who really wants to wait for results? When they came it wasn't much of a shock - but the way they came was.
I got a piece of paper in the mail on a Friday that said I had cancer. It didn't say what kind. It didn't say anything accept to keep my follow up in two weeks. No phone call. No further explanation... just "you have cancer".
So, I dropped by my doc's office on Monday, with the little piece of paper in hand. The whole office was pretty freaked out about the manner in which the results were delivered. Really?!? No call, just a piece of paper in the mail? Yep. It still kind of freaks me out.
I got sent to an oncologist. Two weeks later I had a huge chunk of skin and the "bad spot" removed.
All in all the good outweighed the bad Yes, it was cancer - bad. It was basal cell carcinoma - not really good but they usually don't come back. They got it all on the first swipe - good.
Now we are two weeks outs from the procedure - I have no stitches as of yesterday, but I am stuck together with three thick pieces of steri-tape and still have to move carefully.
I feel weird. I had cancer. Granted I didn't have to have any other therapies outside of a minor surgical procedure but still - cancer?
I feel changes coming - I am old, well, kind of. I have had a skin cancer "scare". I have fibro. I take blood pressure meds. I am often achy - probably from the fibro but I have arthritis in my back, hands, and feet. I buy wrinkle repair cream. I now often think that certain clothes and styles are "too young" for me.
OMG - I am middle aged. I don't think I like this.
I must go, and ponder this. I am hoping it is just an "empty nest" thing and I'll get over it.
Friday, October 8, 2010
It is what it is...
Today is Friday. I am not enthused by this day. I got up, had tea, emailed The Hubster (miss him so stinking much), and went to pickup trash out of my yard because MowerBoy (TeenDream's roommate) was coming to take care of the lawn. Now, for most people, there is no trash in their yard... maybe some leaves twigs, but not trash. For me.... trash. Soda cans and bottles, cardboard pizza holders from the 7/11, paper cups, straws, cigarette butts and packs, napkins, plastic, McDonald's bags..... today I actually found a spoon - a real one, not a plastic one, and cardboard from the inside of a roll of paper towels.
Yep - looked like I was doing community service as I walked around with my grabber and plastic bags filled with general crap and the detritus of people that just don't care.
It irritates me that people litter. It really irritates me that they toss it in my yard.
My dogs bark at these people, Beastie #1 and #2 don't like them any more than I do. You may say I don't know them but I do. I know that they do not care about the city, the planet, nor do they have any respect for other people's property. They are not nice people.
So, when my dogs bark these same people bang on my fence, yell, bark back at my dogs, and throw things over the fence into the yard... aiming for my little dogs. One time a young boy actually picked up a fairly large fallen branch, climbed up the fence and aimed it at my dogs. He was kind of surprised when I caught up with him (after tearing through my house and around the side) and yelled at him. His little friends laughed til I yelled at them too. Then they all got snotty. It came to a head when one of their parent's drove up and asked what was going on. These children were so convinced that they had the "right" to be hateful that they actually crossed there arms and had "you're gonna get it now" looks on their face - and it was directed at me. Much to their surprise they were in for it.... that Dad wasn't happy. They got a little butt chewing and sent home to wait until he got back... btw, he also stated he was calling EVERYONE'S parents.
That would have been perfect if they were the only offenders. They aren't. It is every where in the city in which I live - hard to escape even if you move to the country.
I am ready to leave. That is how I feel about it. In the mood I'm in today, it can't happen fast enough.
Yep - looked like I was doing community service as I walked around with my grabber and plastic bags filled with general crap and the detritus of people that just don't care.
It irritates me that people litter. It really irritates me that they toss it in my yard.
My dogs bark at these people, Beastie #1 and #2 don't like them any more than I do. You may say I don't know them but I do. I know that they do not care about the city, the planet, nor do they have any respect for other people's property. They are not nice people.
So, when my dogs bark these same people bang on my fence, yell, bark back at my dogs, and throw things over the fence into the yard... aiming for my little dogs. One time a young boy actually picked up a fairly large fallen branch, climbed up the fence and aimed it at my dogs. He was kind of surprised when I caught up with him (after tearing through my house and around the side) and yelled at him. His little friends laughed til I yelled at them too. Then they all got snotty. It came to a head when one of their parent's drove up and asked what was going on. These children were so convinced that they had the "right" to be hateful that they actually crossed there arms and had "you're gonna get it now" looks on their face - and it was directed at me. Much to their surprise they were in for it.... that Dad wasn't happy. They got a little butt chewing and sent home to wait until he got back... btw, he also stated he was calling EVERYONE'S parents.
That would have been perfect if they were the only offenders. They aren't. It is every where in the city in which I live - hard to escape even if you move to the country.
I am ready to leave. That is how I feel about it. In the mood I'm in today, it can't happen fast enough.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
It Has Been A While....
So, I haven't written for quite a while. I still have "The Block" when it comes to the new book. Very frustrating...... and I have been caught up in some personal things lately, also very frustrating. I need to put everything behind me, look forward, and move ahead....
TeenDream is moved out, mostly. He is loving apartment life, loving his roommates, enjoying his freedom, and still coming home occasionally to eat and do laundry. Pretty much what I expected. He and I are going through all the remaining crap he has left in the house and then he will do a final clean and be officially gone. I am so happy to see him moving forward. I am so sad that my baby is gone. Mama is here for a visit now and when she goes back home in a few days I will be alone.
No biggie - I have lived alone before. It isn't my favorite thing but I am pretty sure I can fill my time. I will finally be getting my little etsy store up and running getting back to crafting and writing full time, I can hang out with friends now - much more time, and get back to my yoga and exercise program.... and get the house sold!! That is actually my number one priority - selling the house.
It looks like we will be moving to San Diego - I am excited about that. We have friends there and we loved it there the last time. Still waiting on orders in hand though - wish the Navy would hurry upon that. In the interest of moving I have been looking at houses and joined Realtor.com.... nice site for checking out listings and free to join. I have found a few that I like and saved them and get updates when anything changes - new photos, price reduced, details added - which makes things much easier to follow and keep up with. My plan is to fly out there once there is a contract on my home and check out what is available. My Sunny B, bestie extraordinaire is out there - so happy about that - so there will be no hotel bill... there might be bail needed (jk).
The interesting thing about the realtor.com site is that it gives you everything.... the assessment on the house and land is one of the first things I check. (The actual first thing is how far it is from Sunny's house.) With the housing market the way it is you would think that people would price their homes appropriately. For example, we don't intend to ask for our assessment - it is too high. We will ask for a fair price and have some room to negotiate. Well, the people out in El Cajon CA are loopy - some of them are asking as much as $100,000 over assessment and I get reports from the website daily that someone has raised the price. Really?!?! Are they living in the real world or smoking crack?
i realize that many people are upside down in the mortgages.... but to buy a house for $100,000 over assessment would start you out upside down. Who's going to do that? Not me, that's for sure. And raising the price on a house that has already been on the market for 10 months... probably not the way to go.
I have sent some of the house links to my friends... B1, in WA cold only say "What is with the people down there? Those colors are awful!" She is right - for some of the houses I would have to paint the whole inside before I could live there.... the colors are pretty gruesome. On those I would probably ask for a painting allowance from the seller.
All in all, looking at all those horrible pics has really helped me get my house in order for selling. Less is more. Room is important. Brighter rooms are happier rooms......
Anyway - this is just babble to get me back in the groove.... thanks.
TeenDream is moved out, mostly. He is loving apartment life, loving his roommates, enjoying his freedom, and still coming home occasionally to eat and do laundry. Pretty much what I expected. He and I are going through all the remaining crap he has left in the house and then he will do a final clean and be officially gone. I am so happy to see him moving forward. I am so sad that my baby is gone. Mama is here for a visit now and when she goes back home in a few days I will be alone.
No biggie - I have lived alone before. It isn't my favorite thing but I am pretty sure I can fill my time. I will finally be getting my little etsy store up and running getting back to crafting and writing full time, I can hang out with friends now - much more time, and get back to my yoga and exercise program.... and get the house sold!! That is actually my number one priority - selling the house.
It looks like we will be moving to San Diego - I am excited about that. We have friends there and we loved it there the last time. Still waiting on orders in hand though - wish the Navy would hurry upon that. In the interest of moving I have been looking at houses and joined Realtor.com.... nice site for checking out listings and free to join. I have found a few that I like and saved them and get updates when anything changes - new photos, price reduced, details added - which makes things much easier to follow and keep up with. My plan is to fly out there once there is a contract on my home and check out what is available. My Sunny B, bestie extraordinaire is out there - so happy about that - so there will be no hotel bill... there might be bail needed (jk).
The interesting thing about the realtor.com site is that it gives you everything.... the assessment on the house and land is one of the first things I check. (The actual first thing is how far it is from Sunny's house.) With the housing market the way it is you would think that people would price their homes appropriately. For example, we don't intend to ask for our assessment - it is too high. We will ask for a fair price and have some room to negotiate. Well, the people out in El Cajon CA are loopy - some of them are asking as much as $100,000 over assessment and I get reports from the website daily that someone has raised the price. Really?!?! Are they living in the real world or smoking crack?
i realize that many people are upside down in the mortgages.... but to buy a house for $100,000 over assessment would start you out upside down. Who's going to do that? Not me, that's for sure. And raising the price on a house that has already been on the market for 10 months... probably not the way to go.
I have sent some of the house links to my friends... B1, in WA cold only say "What is with the people down there? Those colors are awful!" She is right - for some of the houses I would have to paint the whole inside before I could live there.... the colors are pretty gruesome. On those I would probably ask for a painting allowance from the seller.
All in all, looking at all those horrible pics has really helped me get my house in order for selling. Less is more. Room is important. Brighter rooms are happier rooms......
Anyway - this is just babble to get me back in the groove.... thanks.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Storm Sense
I live on the East Coast - and I always live on some coast - The Hubster is in the Navy - it kind of makes sense. Anyway, we are currently waiting to see exactly what Hurricane Earl will do. I am not terribly concerned... i grew up in Hurricane Alley (Charleston SC) and have been prepping for storms for my whole life. So has TeenDream. You just make sure you have bottled water, batteries, non-perishable food, and toilet paper. then there are a few extras that a wise woman makes sure she has on hand: baby wipes (for bathing if the water goes), more TP than you can shake a stick at (just because you REALLY don't want to get caught short), and brownies - the brownies should be self-explanatory.
Before a storm there are certain things you should always do:
Spray for bugs.... use a good indoor outdoor spray - trust me on this. Storms are aphrodisiacs for bugs... I call it the "Oh my God we are going to die let's do it" phase. They do it, goto ground for the storm, give birth and die. Two or three days after the storm you are overrun with a million little bigs... Nasty.
Do all your laundry. You don't know if you will lose power and water - it is better to lose those two things AFTER your clothes are clean. Take if from someone who washed he clothes in a garbage can after a typhoon..... do your laundry.
Wash your dishes - same thing as with your clothes.
Put clean sheets on the bed - even if it isn't clean sheet day. You will love yourself for it
Bake those brownies, cookies, whatever.
Make sure you have plenty of propane or charcoal for your grill. If you lose power you can cook the perishable food in your freezer - don't tell me you can't cook a turkey or ham on a grill, or muffins. biscuits, and pizza. you can do it - I have - but only if you have what you need to run the grill.
Charge everything!! Phones, hand held games, dvd players, iPods, laptops - whatever. Particularly if you have kids.... that should be self explanatory.
DON'T freak out. There isn't anything you can do about the weather. You can evacuate - and some people have to - but other than that just work on being calm. If you freak out then anyone you are with may do so as well. The only ting worse than an adult freaking out is two adults freaking out.
Become familiar with the terms "Cone of Uncertainty" and the 1-2-3 Rule. They are basically the same thing. They show you the potential range for the storm.
Remember that in the past few years weather has become "sexy". Really?!?! Yep. Jim Cantori and the rest of the Weather Channel peeps are really working on making weather sexy and dramatic. Well, weather is dramatic enough, thank you very much. Watching somebody stand outside in the middle of a storm has become part of our lives these days.... And Weather guys and gals are turned on by their jobs - they want you to like it too . They want you to see that their job is vital, sexy, and dangerous. I'll go with the vital. I'll even go a little bit with the sexy. Dangerous?!?! Only if you go out in it - and they do. Take what they say with a grain of salt..... just remember to be prepared.
Anyway - 125 mph winds don't scare me after doing the typhoon thing in Guam. Our wind gauges (on the AFB there) broke at 185 and that was BEFORE the eye wall got there.....
So, come on over Earl. We are ready. See you when you get here....
Before a storm there are certain things you should always do:
Spray for bugs.... use a good indoor outdoor spray - trust me on this. Storms are aphrodisiacs for bugs... I call it the "Oh my God we are going to die let's do it" phase. They do it, goto ground for the storm, give birth and die. Two or three days after the storm you are overrun with a million little bigs... Nasty.
Do all your laundry. You don't know if you will lose power and water - it is better to lose those two things AFTER your clothes are clean. Take if from someone who washed he clothes in a garbage can after a typhoon..... do your laundry.
Wash your dishes - same thing as with your clothes.
Put clean sheets on the bed - even if it isn't clean sheet day. You will love yourself for it
Bake those brownies, cookies, whatever.
Make sure you have plenty of propane or charcoal for your grill. If you lose power you can cook the perishable food in your freezer - don't tell me you can't cook a turkey or ham on a grill, or muffins. biscuits, and pizza. you can do it - I have - but only if you have what you need to run the grill.
Charge everything!! Phones, hand held games, dvd players, iPods, laptops - whatever. Particularly if you have kids.... that should be self explanatory.
DON'T freak out. There isn't anything you can do about the weather. You can evacuate - and some people have to - but other than that just work on being calm. If you freak out then anyone you are with may do so as well. The only ting worse than an adult freaking out is two adults freaking out.
Become familiar with the terms "Cone of Uncertainty" and the 1-2-3 Rule. They are basically the same thing. They show you the potential range for the storm.
Remember that in the past few years weather has become "sexy". Really?!?! Yep. Jim Cantori and the rest of the Weather Channel peeps are really working on making weather sexy and dramatic. Well, weather is dramatic enough, thank you very much. Watching somebody stand outside in the middle of a storm has become part of our lives these days.... And Weather guys and gals are turned on by their jobs - they want you to like it too . They want you to see that their job is vital, sexy, and dangerous. I'll go with the vital. I'll even go a little bit with the sexy. Dangerous?!?! Only if you go out in it - and they do. Take what they say with a grain of salt..... just remember to be prepared.
Anyway - 125 mph winds don't scare me after doing the typhoon thing in Guam. Our wind gauges (on the AFB there) broke at 185 and that was BEFORE the eye wall got there.....
So, come on over Earl. We are ready. See you when you get here....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)