Saturday, July 10, 2010

Anger, Rage, Discontent

So, what do you do when you are angry? Me? I usually yell and get it out of my system. Or, I keep my mouth shut and chew the inside of it. Or, i just let it go. That last doesn't happen to often but it does happen. This is not the way I used to deal with it - I held it close and loved that feeling, that burn of righteous anger.... not a nice way to be.

Now, what do you do when someone else is angry? I usually try to diffuse it or side track it.... make them see a funny side to it, deflect it... anything to not be around it. I am often successful.

I also try to get people to see the roots of their anger. It usually isn't what set them off and can sometimes be something that they didn't even realize made them angry in the first place. Often we "push down" what we think others will find to be inappropriate anger or if we personally feel that the anger isn't "right".

Here's the problem with that - anger is a feeling - there is no right or wrong to it... feelings can only be controlled to a point - you cannot control what you feel, only how you express it. That is fact.

Now, what do you do when someone is unreasonably angry and hates everyone and everything, including themselves? When they don't even know why they are angry?

Yeah, that is a tough one. Stumped you didn't I? Well, the way I see it is if you love them you just tough it out with them. I know, I wrote about this just the other day but it is really on my mind right now.

Someone I love is angry like this. No matter what I say or do this person is lashing out - cruelly at times. It hurts on so many levels, but mostly I am hurting FOR this person, not because of them. Don't get me wrong, I am hurt by this behavior, but I know it isn't necessarily personal. I also know that we always hurt the ones we love so at this point anger is far better than indifference.

Life sucks when you wake up at 3 am to a nasty e-mail. Now it is almost 5 and the e-mail is still in the front of my brain. No more sleep for this weary soul.

Off to ruminate.

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